Carpe Diem Boys — Our Time Is Limited, Make Every Day Count
This story is not (directly) about guns and ammo, or reloading gear, or any of the little details of our sport. It, instead, is about life… and, sadly, about death. As you may know by now, Tom Clancy died this week at age 66. Clancy created a new fiction genre that entertained millions — the “military techno-thriller”. Tom was a damn fine writer, and like you and me, he was also a true “gun guy”. He will be missed.
Tom Clancy’s unexpected passing was a “wake-up call” for your Editor. I turn 58 this month. That number is not much less than 66, the number of years Clancy got to spend on our blue planet. This got me to thinking, “What if I only had ten more years to live — how would I want to live my life? What really counts the most? What things would I do differently? What dreams would I pursue?”
From the demographics of this website, I know we have thousands of readers in their 50s, 60s, and 70s. Hopefully we will all live long, happy, and fruitful lives. But it’s not a bad idea to consider that we are all mortal, and the clock is ticking. Consider this — in the United States, the average male life expectancy is 76 years*. Using that number as a benchmark, I personally may have another 18 years to enjoy life and to do the things I love — shooting, traveling, sailing, camping, listening to music, being with friends and family. Breaking that down into months, I have 216 more months to do fun and rewarding stuff. Just 216 months — that’s a real number my brain can comprehend all too well. If I live an average lifespan, that means I also only have 939 more weekends to do all that I want to do. With less than 1000 weekends remaining, I don’t want to waste a single one. Here’s a chart that shows how many more weekends you may have, based on your current age:
Living a Life with More Good Times, and Fewer Regrets
Recently, a group of men, very near the end of their lives, were surveyed. They were asked if they would do things differently if they could live their lives over again. The vast majority of these men gave surprisingly similar responses, which fit into five “Life Lessons”. These “Top 5 Regrets of the Dying” were reported in a story by Bronnie Ware, writing for the AARP online magazine. Ware writes: “When questioned about any regrets they had or anything they would do differently, common themes surfaced.” Here are the five regrets most often mentioned by older men:
1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
“This was the most common regret of all. When people realize that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. ”
Lesson: Don’t wait to follow your dreams. Be true to yourself.
2. I wish I didn’t work so hard.
“This came from every male patient [surveyed]. All of the men… deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.”
Lesson: Don’t let your work crowd out other important aspects of life.
3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.
“Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming.”
Lesson: Express yourself truthfully. Don’t suppress your feelings for decades.
4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
“There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort they deserved. Many [were] so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years.”
Lesson: Take an interest your friends’ lives; keep bonds of friendship strong.
5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.
“This is a surprisingly common [regret]. Many did not realize until the end that happiness is a choice.”
Lesson: Affirmatively pursue the things that bring you happiness. Don’t just stick to old habits.
Turn Off the Computer, and Do Something Memorable with Your Friends Today
How does this all apply to our shooting hobby? Well, if (like me) you are middle-aged (or older), go have some fun this weekend! Load up your rifle and get to the range. Don’t put off doing the things that make you happy. Call those old buddies you may not have seen in a long time. Renew friendships. Get out into nature. And start figuring out how you can live your dreams. As the saying goes, “Time waits for no man”.
*One of our readers pointed out that the numbers actually work out better than this, because once a man survives to later life, men of his surviving age cohort enjoy a projected lifespan longer than the average projected lifespan from birth. For example, using actuarial tables, a man born exactly 60 years ago (still alive today), has a calculated life expectancy of 23.4 years… meaning he would live to age 83.4 years, on average. CLICK HERE to see actuarial-predicted longevity based on your birthdate.
Similar Posts:
- Time Waits for No Man… Use Your Remaining Days Wisely
- Make Every Day Count — Carpe Diem — Time Waits for No Man
- Carpe Diem Friends — Our Time Is Limited, Make Every Day Count
- Live Life to the Fullest — Time Waits for No One
- In Memoriam — Walt Berger, Founder of Berger Bullets
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Tags: actuarial table, Clancy, Life Planning, Lifespan, longevity, shooting
No offense, but this article was written by an innumerate**.
According to the Social Security Adminstration (they have very good actuaries and statisticians), the life expectancy of a living 65-y/o male today is age 84 (not 76, as your table indicates). There is a difference between life expectancy at birth and remaining life expectancy after attaining a certain age.
Link to Social Security Administration life expectancy calculator: http://www.ssa.gov/OACT/population/longevity.html
** innumerate = a person lacking basic knowledge of mathematics and arithmetic (in this case, statistics and actuarial science). Maybe I should coin a new word – inactuariate.
But that’s OK. We should have fun for whatever time we have left!
Take care of your body, it’s the only one you have. Be proactive when it comes to physicals, shots, and specialized exams. Get rid of the smokes, eat the right foods, and exercise. All of you guys that look like you’re pregnant, lose the weight…it’s a killer!
Sorry, but I don’t think life is all about being happy. It’s about commitment and duty, and work is a big part of that. You work a lot because you have to or because you want to; either way, what’s so bad about that? When I’m laying on my deathbed I doubt if I will be wishing I had cured cancer and won the Nobel Peace prize. I’ll probably be wondering what comes next, and was I good enough for what is to come. But for those who just think we’re worm food I guess there will be major regrets for not having had more fun in life.
I’m 58 and have just been told I have end stage renal falure ( yep no Kidny function well 5% ) now thats a slap in the face.
Did I go to the Dr for check ups NO my last visit was 4 years ago ( if we had found it sooner etc.etc)
YOU do not know when you will have your LIFE changed so make the most of it while you can.
Chris,
You’d make a great slave! On my death bed I know I won’t regret not working enough. One of the best daily bulletin articles yet!!
C’mon, Randall, cut the guy some slack!
Your comment may be “numerate”, but it completely misses the point. Go out and smell the roses!
All the rest of you guys, compare this site and any other shooting site. How many have thoughful essays like this? Then say a prayer that our dear Editor will hang on for another 20 years.
BTW – He even updated his essay to include your actuarial insight. Outstanding! Numerate, compassionate, and flexible. S**t, now I’m gonna have to up my game…
OK DesertLefty, slack it is. I agree with the author’s sentiment – pursue happiness, as stated in the last line of my comment.
If there’s anything I like better than a man who has his priorities straight, it’s one who has his priorities straight, plus is flexible and open to suggestions.
The author is now among the “numerates”, but it’s OK either way.
Alex,
What’s slavery got to do with anything? I work because I want to and I like my job. There are too many people in this country who milk the system and contribute nothing, and then there are those who can’t find a decent job because of the screwed-up economy. I’m not saying you shouldn’t enjoy life, just that there is more to life than hedonism.
In 1987 I was diagnosed with terminal melanoma. I was told I had 6 months to live. I spent a week after that reflecting on what that meant at 42 and in the prime of my career. While I was in college I was exposed to 1st Corinthians 13. I suggest you do if you have not read it. From that period of reflection I concluded that the most important thing in life; what gives it true meaning is one’s contribution to other people’s lives. I am often asked why I feel so strongly about things. As the man said you only get one shot at this part of your life. As most humans I talk a better game than I play but appreciate every day it is HIS gift to you.
Tom Alves
The certainty of mortality became more than a possibility for me at age 40. I survived cancer at that time, and told myself I would not forget those lessons. Which lessons I have largely forgotten.
At age 52 I broke my neck, spine, ribs, nose, spleen and other bits when an inattentive motorist turned in front of my motorcycle. As a result of this experience mortality no longer holds the fear which motivated me after the cancer.
Today I am happy. I am happy to work. I am happy to enjoy my friends. I am happy to ride motorcycle again. So. Take the lessons life offers and I hope each of you is happy NOW. Tat Twam Asi.
Learning the true value of various aspects of life is an experience I had very early in life as a 25 yr old army “laig” infantry grunt looking ahead to Vietnam. Boy! Am I the loser or what? The only war we have lost and I’m in it!!
Turns out I came through w/o a scratch. It left me with the feeling that I no longer fear death. Dying can be most unpleasant but death is not to be feared. In case you hadn’t noticed IT WILL COME TO US ALL.
So, from that time on I just did the best I could and tried to treat my fellow humans as I would like to be treated. (Golden what?) If the end came this moment there is not a lot I could do. Of course, I take care of myself and family, etc. I trust THE BIG GUY will give me a fair shake. If He has a sense of humor that would be nice.
I am living the dream NOW. I have been blessed with so much I can only be thankful.
Beware or bucket lists. The main item on mine was to attend the F-Class World Championships. Now that its ticked off I’m struggling to come up with something else as inspiring! And according to this article I still have 20 years left!